A Time For Change: Chapter 7

December 12th, 2008 | By Sonnie Johnson

I titled the entry with a date, as I had done every significant event that happened to me since I left Richmond. When my mind got racing I had to write down my thoughts quick. When I was home Lena would have listened. I wouldn’t have needed to look at a calendar to figure out the date. May 4^th. I gasped for air. All thoughts of why I had ventured into Sean’s room disappeared.

It was our anniversary. I wondered if he had thought of me today. Did he go to our spot and spark a blunt? Did he let Toni Braxton float through his radio waves to remember how I felt? I didn’t even remember what day it was.

I pushed the thoughts out of my head fast. I opened the safe and pulled out the best weed I had. I moved the stacks of hundred dollar bills that blocked the little glad lock containers of weed I kept. I grabbed the NYC Diesel. I heard Sean in the back of my mind telling me I over think on the D. I pulled the Heavy Duty Fruity from the corner backing.

“This should lighten the mood a little bit.” I said out loud.

“Did you forget I was out here?”

“Ain’t nobody forgot about you. Answer the door when Lob knocks in a few minutes.” Then I thought of all the shit she had been through tonight. It tickled me a little a bit. I’m surprised that she wasn’t in a rush to leave. I giggled to myself again and softened my attitude just a little. “Just Lob in and nobody else. Please?” I said after a short pause. I listened for her to respond, but instead I heard the locks begin to unclick. Then I heard Lob’s voice clear and less rapid than it had been earlier.

“I’ll be out in just a second.” I shouted as I locked the safe with the key and scrambled the numbers on the combination spinner. I rolled down the Ashanti poster, Sean used to cover the hole in the wall that held the safe. I pinned the bottom down with thumbtacks. I grabbed the dirty gun from under Sean’s pillow. He had found it and brought it home. Other kids bring home stray dogs or cats. My boy brings home guns.

I stuck the gun in the front of my waistband. I stopped and listened to make sure I didn’t hear any voice other than Lob. News travels fast around the hood. He could all ready know Goldie ain’t protecting me any more. I heard him and Trish laughing. I had only seen Lob laugh when he was real drunk. I stuck my head out the door and there they were chatting it up on the couch.

Trish had a real way of talking to people. She could deal with people feeding her bullshit, without getting upset. Then she even managed to get her way. She could pull information out of people, but I didn’t know if she was capable of using that info to hurt people. I had a lot of questions about how Trish would handle The Life.

I opened the door and Trish got up. I asked her to wait in my bedroom for a minute. She did with no objection. Before she disappeared she turned around a flashed Lob a smile. He smirked and nodded back, then she continued down the hallway into my room.

When the door clicked, Lob began to talk. “Goldie was supposed to make four major deliveries today. He’s got a lot of very hungry niggas out looking for him. Nobody seen him, heard from him since those shots popped off earlier. I’m the only one that knows he was here.” I put my hand up and he stopped. I got up and started to pace the floor in the same tracks that Goldie had traced earlier. Lob attempted to start talking again, but I gave him a look that made him adjust himself in the chair. I didn’t know what to think. I paced a couple more steps then motioned for him to finish speaking.

“I don’t know exactly what’s going on out there. I’m making sure that no one can get close to here though. I got your block tight, but the other areas can’t be controlled right now.”

“How much do I owe you?”

“Nothing. Just stay in the crib.”

“You never do anything for free. What’s the catch? Coming back to get me later?”

“Come on now.”

“You don’t do anything for free. Why should I trust you if you won’t accept my money?”

“I’ve been paid already. You couldn’t match what I’m being paid to keep you safe. Just stay in the crib and I’ll be back later.”

“Paid by who?” I asked in a calm voice, then once again in a much louder demanding voice as he continued to walk away without an answer. I rushed in front of the door to block him from exiting. “Paid by who?” I glared into his eyes making sure not to blink, making sure he knew that I was serious.

“Look, you’ll be safe tonight. Just stay inside please.” He said in an almost pleading manner. I moved out the way and let him pass. “Lock the door. I’ll be back in a little bit to check on you.” Then he closed the door. I stood there staring blankly. “Lock the door.” I heard him yell from the outside. I began locking the door when I heard him yell “Thank you.”

I went into Sean’s bedroom and rolled up. I was so deep in thought, I didn’t even remember breaking the weed up, opening the wrap, or even lighting up. I snapped back into reality when the Heavy duty made me choke. I inhaled again before I finished coughing, which only caused me to cough harder.

“You okay?”

“You wanna hit this?”

“Naw. Can I come in?’

“Just give me a sec okay.”

‘What else could happen tonight. What else could possibly go wrong?’ I thought to myself as I noticed my notebook on the bed. Sean, where are you?

A Big House Reality: Chapter 6

December 9th, 2008 | By Sonnie Johnson

Thelma hated being in her house alone. Her divorce would be final in a few days, and all she could do was think about James. She hadn’t spent a lot of time with her kids since they chose to move with their father. Had she really been so horrible, her whole family would leave her. She thought about the way her life had played out over the last couple months. She couldn’t see what she had done wrong.

She picked up the phone to call James, but quickly slammed the receiver down. What could she say this time that would be different from what she said last time. She hung her head, then stood up and shouted out into the room. ‘I was the best thing he ever had. What he gonna do without me?’ Then collapsed back in her chair and broke into tears.

The phone began to ring. She wiped her eyes and cleared her throat.

“Hello.”

“Mrs. Irving, this is Wendy Watchman of FR Productions. How are you today?”

“I’m fine. I was wondering when I was going to hear from you again.”

“Sorry, got caught up in some technical stuff, but everything is fine now. We’ve set up the show for the weekend of June 3^rd.”

“And I need my entire family for this correct?”

“Yes ma’am, and confidentiality is also very important.”

“I am looking forward to this, Ms. Watchman.”

“Great. I can’t wait to meet you and your family.”

Thelma couldn’t wait to call James. She was going so fast she had to redial the number several times before getting it right. The conversation was short, as James agreed to the date and told Thelma he looked forward to seeing her before hanging up. How could he do that? He made you feel so bad, by doing nothing but being sweet. She could sure use him for the other things he does well. She was tired of buying new batteries.

A Time For Change: Chapter 6

November 14th, 2008 | By Sonnie Johnson

I didn’t know what to say, so I sat there and said nothing. Sky looked blank and distant. She didn’t move, just stood there with her back to the still open door. I didn’t move, just stayed leaning against the wall of her hallway.

“Do you know how to roll up?” She asked as she finally broke the silence. I shook my head yes. “You any good?”

“I never rolled a wrap before, but I’m sure it isn’t that different.”

Sky said never mind, as she passed me in the hallway in route to her room. I wanted to follow her, but she shut the door before I even turned around. I walked to the door just as a little hood rat poked his head in. I held my hand to his chest as he tried to force his way through the door.

“Sky, you all right” He yelled at the top of his voice.

“She’s fine. Just went to get her head straight. Can I help you with something?”

“Naw. Tell her to hit up Lob when she gets the chance.” He started walking away before he even finished his sentence. I’m beginning to understand where Sky gets cutting people off before they finish speaking. I closed the door and latched every lock lining the door frame. When I finished, I heard Sky’s bedroom door open. She stuck her head out and looked around.

“Was that Lob?”

“Yeah”
“Good” she said as she went into the room Sean came out earlier. She closed the door behind her.

A Time For Change:Chapter 5

October 26th, 2008 | By Sonnie Johnson

When I heard the car tires spin off, I knew that it was Trish, and her cab driver was trying to get out of here and fast. I was surprised the he had brought her this far into Lynnville , at night no less. I unlocked all the bolts on the door and peeped my head out. Trish was making her way through the hood rats that returned for the best post up position. I bet that was the number one cause of murder around here. Goldie doesn’t control his people. His philosophy is the strong survive. So, if you can’t protect your corner, you lost it. I understood his point of view, but I thought that caused more slow money days. It wasn’t my block so I let him run it his way. It’s just hard to keep up with all the changes that happen on this block. Back home you knew everyone on the set and if someone new came in he would meet the welcoming party.

Trish came through the door with a little baggie in her hand. The little boy on the corner said this would blow your mind. I stuck my head out the door, Lil J, raised his hand. I mouthed ‘how much’. He put both hands in the air and smiled so I could see his mouth full of shiny teeth. I nodded and closed the door.

I grabbed the bag out of Trish’s hand. She stood there stunned. I guess she thought that my place would be decked out. She was stuck in one spot. I asked if she wanted something to drink. She said something strong, so I poured us both Hennessey straight in my fancy glasses. I had thought about fixing this place up, but I kept too much money in here, giving fiends another reason to break in was pushing it.

“So, now I see why you never want company.”

Just as I was about to tell her she could get the fuck out, there came a very fast loud knocking on the door. I set the glasses down on the living room table, and opened the chestnut box in the middle. I pulled out my .25 and walked to the door. I asked who it was, as I peeked through the hole.

“Goldie!” he shouted. “We need to talk.”

“This is why I don’t have company. Just sit still and be quiet.” I said as I motioned Trish to take a seat on the love seat in the corner of the room. I tucked the gun into the back of my sweats and pulled the strings tight enough to hold it in place. I pulled my shirt over the back and opened the door. Goldie pushed his way in. I was not used to seeing him in this state. I stood back as he paced the floor, mumbling under his breath.

“What’s up, Goldie?” He continued to pace the floor as if the words had never come out of my mouth. I hate when I waste my words, but by his demeanor, I thought it better to wait until he composed himself. He was dressed up in his war gear. All black, scully, gloves and all. Sweat beads formed and fell from his forehead every time he took a breath. His hands were balled into fist, clenched tight. His mouth was tight with every word that partially managed to get uttered. Then like some thing had broken his trance, he stopped.

“I need a re-up. Tonight.” He said in a softer, more acceptable tone.

“It doesn’t work like that, and you know it.” I calmly replied as he began pacing the floor again. “Plus, we’re in the presence of mixed company.”

“I don’t give a fuck about that bitch. I lost all my work tonight. Do you hear me? All of it. I got my two main soldiers coming, and I ain’t got no work.”

“I didn’t rob you, so you need to calm the fuck down. You need to remember who the fuck you are talking to.” I started to reach around my back for my gun when Sean’s voice startled me.

“Where the fuck you been?” Goldie shouted at Sean. “You should have been out there holdin me down. You ain’t no fucking good. Ain’t never been good. Ain’t gon never be good. I should have let your mom abort you.”

I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. I had never heard Goldie lose his grip that way. I’ve seen him beat a man within an inch of his life, but that was slight aggression. This was something different. This was rage. Sean stood there expression less. The last time I saw that look on his face, I had just met him. I remembered how sorry I had felt for him.

I knew that the best thing to do was let them work things out for themselves, but as Goldies’ remark got more loud and hateful, it got harder to sit by. Goldie’s attention was locked on Sean, so I took that time to get better position flanking Goldie. He had kept me safe over the last two years, and I appreciated it, but Sean was my son. He was the only one in town that knew my real name, my real story.

I made eye contact with Trish. She was more intrigued than she was scared. I stared at her with an intense glare hoping to get her attention with out drawing Goldie’s. She caught my gaze, and I darted my eyes towards the hallway that lead to two tiny bedrooms. She shifted in her chair and made the handle of her .25 very noticeable from my angle. I was shocked, but was snapped back into reality quickly when Goldie mentioned my name.

“You think that bitch really gives a damn about you?” He questioned as he shot his eyes towards me. That was it. He had gone too far. I put my head down like I was to scared to say anything. He turned back facing Sean, who was no longer standing in the hallway. He was making his way in front of Trish. “See, she act like she all hard, but when it comes down to it,”

He stopped talking as he felt the barrel of my gun push into the back of his head. He put both his hands in the air.

“Bitch, you know I’ll kill you for this.”

“I think I gave you the wrong representation of myself. You think I give a damn if you call me names. You think I can’t handle a want to be drug dealer.” I pulled back the hammer of the gun, loud enough to make sure it was a clear and resounding noise that made Goldie flinch. “I made you what you are. Don’t you forget that. I gave you the work that made you a king. I have nothing to lose and taking your life would mean nothing to me. I can get your body disposed of for a minimal cost. Matter of fact I bet I can get it done for free.”

Sean shook his head. He hadn’t spoke since he had called my name upon making his first appearance. I didn’t know exactly what he wanted until he took his gun out of his pants. He slid it to Trish. I reached into the back of Goldie’s pants until I located the butt of his gun. I pulled it from his pants and handed it to Sean. He gave Goldie’s gun to Trish, who grasped it with the bottom of her tank velour top. I took two steps back and to the side to make room for Goldie to get out the front door. I still had my gun pointed to his head as he turned and focused his dark eyes on me.

I put the gun down to my side and regained those steps as I got real up close and personal with Goldie. The stature of his hard shoulders softened the more he realized I wasn’t scared. The truth be told, I was terrified. I didn’t give it away though. I stood there motionless like a tree. He huffed and puffed under his breath.

“No matter how hard the wind blows, the mountain will never bow to it.” Goldie was a little slow on the up take. He didn’t understand what I had said. I dropped my head slightly in disgust. I guess that was the mistake Goldie was waiting for. He grabbed my throat and began to choke the shit out of me. I swung the gun and connected with the top of Goldie’s head. It didn’t stop him, so I didn’t stop either. After the fourth hit, his grasp loosened from my neck, in time to see Sean pushing Trish into his bedroom. I swung one more time and this one opened a huge gash on Goldie’s forehead. He stuttered back and then made is way to the door.

“This isn’t over, bitch.” I heard him remark, as I tried to regain my breath. The door closed with a loud bang, and I felt a hand on my back. Without thinking I turned a swung. I put too much behind the punch, thankfully. I lost my balance and just grazed the side of Sean’s face. I felt wetness on my knuckles and immediately turned my attention to Sean. There was a stream of tears rolling down his face. I had never seen him cry. Everything that boy had been through, and this was the first time I had seen him cry.

He grabbed my hand and kissed it. My eyes begged him, NO. I grasped his hand hard and began shaking my head, NO. His eyes pleaded with me. Usually he asks me to help him get out of trouble. This time he wanted me to let him go. I knew I had no choice. I called for Trish. She opened the door.

“Give him his gun back.” I said refusing to let go of Sean’s hand. She wiped off the gun and handed it back to Sean. He took it with his free hand. My eyes began to fill and the tears burned right into my brain. I couldn’t lose him. I couldn’t let that happen.

“I’m tired of being tired.” He caught my attention. I let go of his hand, stood up, and wiped my face. Here he was 13, caught in a life that he didn’t ask for, but instead of running he was going to fight back. All this time I thought I was teaching him. It’s sad when you realize too late the lessons you should learn.

“Ready for war?” I asked trying to hide what I was really feeling. His face hardened over, and his body became tense. His fist clenched the gun, while his other hand hung by his side. I grabbed it, but this time I made him hit himself several times in the chest. I kept hitting him in the same place until he grimaced. “Remember that pain, if you get caught in a bad position. The pain means your still alive, and as long as your alive,,,”

“It ain’t over.” He mouthed back.

I had so much I wanted to say. I wanted to tell him how much I loved him. How much of a difference he had made in my life. I wanted lock him in the bedroom and never let him out. I wanted to save him. To make sure he was alright. Instead I held my tongue between my teeth. Every time I came close to letting go, I’d bite down as hard as I could. When his hand touched the front door, I tasted the blood as it began to fill my mouth.

“I love you, mama.” He said as he closed the door behind him. I ran to the door and opened it. Sean didn’t turn around, he just kept on walking. The burning from my eyes and the pain welling up on my tongue, made me realize this wasn’t my choice. I couldn’t make it for him. We both are still alive so it isn’t over.

“I love you, son.” He paused for only a second. Then kept going off into the night. I didn’t know if I’d ever see him again, and my heart ached badly. “Please, come back to me, son. Please come back to me.”

A Time For Change: Chapter 4

September 8th, 2008 | By Sonnie Johnson

When the cab turned onto my street, I sat up and began getting my things together. Okay Trish, he’s not home tonight, you can get some good sleep. I reached down and fastened the straps on my shoes. I stretched up and looked out the front window and spotted Twon’s car. It was parked in the playground parking lot that cornered Telsa Street.

“Driver, keep going please!” I shouted as I ducked down in the back seat of the cab. I caught a glance of Twon peeping out the upstairs window. That slick bastard. He knows that if he cuts off that light I won’t come in the house. He just can’t wait for me to come home.

“Where to now, Ms.?” The cabbies barely understandable voice broke my train of thought.

“Just drive.” I snapped back. Then I composed myself and apologized. He nodded back. “Just get us out of the complex.”

What next. If I go home, I swear I think I’ll kill him. I reached into my purse looking for my cell phone and saw the card given to me by the mystery man. Then I grabbed my phone and dialed Sky’s number. I rang five times before she grunted hello into the phone.

“Were you a sleep?” I questioned not knowing what to expect.

“No. I’m trying to put some smoke into the air, but I ain’t got no wraps.”

“Well, I can bring you some if you let me come over.”

“Okay. Make sure they ain’t dry. Matter fact just get 3 of every flavor.”

“Anything else?”

“Yeah, a coke.”

“Be there soon.” Click. She cut me off before the sentence got all the way out of my mouth. “Driver, can you take me to the store on Minnieville, then I need to go to Lynnville. He looked at me through the rearview mirror with worry etched into his face. “Please.” I added with a little bat of my eye and flip of my lip. He nodded and turned forward. The rest of the trip, he never looked at me in the eye.

We pulled into the parking lot going way to fast. The jerking reaction made me slide to the far end of the cab. I reached down and collected the contents of my handbag as the cabbie stole the last parking space from a little old woman.

I got out of the car, searching for my credit card. I stumbled on the sidewalk right into the arms of the handsome man. He had dark eyes that made looking away impossible. His girlfriend walked up behind him. She chuckled as she walked to the opposite side of the jeep parked next to my cab. She knew her man was amazing, and she didn’t mind that other women appreciate that. I told him thank you and moved away so he could join his girl in a good laugh. Good for them, at least someone is happily in love.

After I filled Sky’s want list. $65 worth. I got back in the cab, and wondered what kind of reception I would get from Sky when I arrived. Fuck it. I’m on my way now. Maybe I’ll even put some smoke in the air.

A Time For Change: Chapter 3

August 10th, 2008 | By Sonnie Johnson

From inside the cab I called Travis and gave him Big sistas number. One call from me and he gets $1,200 and sometimes long life clients, even though in this business that could be short. If I wanted to hustle myself I could control this town. Everyone here is weak and not about business. That made doing business to damn risky.

We pulled up to the border of Lynnville projects. It must have rained when we were in the club. The night air was crisp and just on the brink of being warm. Early spring my favorite time of the year. I told the driver to pull over. I offered him the amount shown on the meter. He refused. I said okay and flipped a $20 over the front seat.

“You shouldn’t be walking out here all alone, ma’am.” He said poking his head out the drivers’ side window.

“To me, this is the safest place in the world.” I turned my back and walked away. He stayed there for a moment, then quickly pulled off when a group of local thugs got to close to the side of his cab.

I didn’t like living here. I got the money to move someplace nice, but no place nice could be as safe.

Goldie, by far the scariest of all the rats around here, was the best person to do business with. He didn’t speak to me when we weren’t talking about business. When he did want to do business he always had the money, he was always on time, and he told me I can walk safe in his hood. So I dropped the cost of his inventory. Now he supplies to most of the little rats around here, and most of the city. He never tells anyone where he gets his work, so the whole hood thinks he’s banging me. And that’s cool no one fucks with me. It works for me.

I walked down the street. It seemed to be dead tonight. I bet I’d get a delivery soon. There were no fiends, no little kids outside playing way past their bedtimes. Silence and that was worrisome the longer I walked and the quieter it seemed to get. I quickened my pace and made my way into the dirty corridor that led to my apartment.

I checked the halls, both ways, twice. Something just didn’t feel right. I opened the door and went in fast. I bolted all five locks from the inside. Took off my knock Vera Wang slingbacks, and began to move close to the couch.

He startled me as he began to move around. I knew that he was still having those bad dreams that haunted him the 2 years I’ve known him. I heard him softly murmur ‘I don’t want to be a gangster. It costs to much’.

My heart broke looking at him, remembering how alone I used to feel. Shit, used to feel. The way I have always felt. I stayed a safe distance from his swinging range and called his name sereval times raising my voice each time until he opened his eyes.

“They almost got him tonight.” He didn’t have to tell me who. I knew. Goldie had started making a lot of enemies. He had such low prices on his work, no one else could compete. “I put $135,000 in your safe. Do you mind if I crash here tonight?”

“You know you don’t have to ask. Go get in the bed we’ll talk in the morning.”

“I’ll make you pancakes.”

“I can’t wait.” I said as he sauntered off into his bedroom. He was 13 and on the fast track to taking over his father’s business. He had no fear in dangerous situations, because he had nothing to live for, but boy is he smart. I let him have unlimited access to my apartment as long as he brought good grades home. So, he did. I even had to go to the school and get him put in advanced classes so he wouldn’t be bored.

I can’t have kids so he’s the closest I’ll ever get.

A Time For Change: Chapter 2

July 30th, 2008 | By Sonnie Johnson

I snuck out of the club a few minutes after Sky left. I only came out because I wanted to get Sky out of that dank apartment. She was so beautiful; I don’t understand why she just wastes her life away stuck inside the house. If I had those long legs and a smile that lights up a room I wouldn’t be in the situation I’m in now.

“How do you know Sky?”

The voice was one I had never heard before. I turned to look and there was the cutest white boy I had ever seen up close. He had a short hair cut, and the light hue of his hair made his hazel eyes so sexy.

“How do you know Sky?

“I don’t.” I lied knowing he could tell.

“Tell her it’s time to stop running.” He handed me a card, turned and began to walk away. Every girl waiting for a cab on the corner was checked him out as he walked away. With their eyes on him, it was easy for me to snag the first cab that pulled up to the curb. If Sky was running from him, she was a fool.

I stuck the card in my bag and told the driver ‘643 Telsa, please’. I closed my eyes and imagined how wonderful it would be to be Sky. Hell, right now I would be happy to be anybody but Atrishia Baxter.

A Time For Change: Chapter 1

July 19th, 2008 | By Sonnie Johnson

I shouldn’t have come. Everything in me said go home before something bad happens. Something bad always happens to me. I can never go out and just have a good time.

“Come on, let’s grab a table,” Trish exclaimed as she grabbed my arm and pulled me through the hoards of mother’s that left their kids with god knows who, trying to find one of this men who haven’t seen their kids since their baby’s mama took them to court for not paying child support. God I hate people. Here I was in the middle of the most desperate of them. I shot a tense smile at Trish as I snatched my arm from her grasp. Go home Sky, go home.

Trish jumped into a booth just as a big sista was about to sit down.

“Sorry, taken” she said with a smile on her face. I stepped up and took a seat next to Trish. Big sista was dressed to the T. She wore an all black Armani suit with a pair of heels over 6 inches. Every hair was in place, and her make-up looked like Picasso had painted it. She was sharp, and by the look on her face she was also mad.

Two skinny girls walked up behind her. Neither had half the class of big sista. The one in the bright red and yellow tube top leaned over and whispered into big sista’s ear, which caused her to look at me with a long hard pause.

“Why don’t you sit down and have a drink?” I said as I returned the glance that all three were now shooting at me.

“Okay” said big sista as she slid into the booth opposite Trish. Her two flunkies attempted to scoot in, until both big sista and I focused those glances on them. Bright red and yellow tube top pushed bright yellow and red tube top into the sea of dancing idiots until they disappeared.

“I’ll go and get us some drinks. Rum and coke?” Trish asked.

“Make sure it’s Bacardi white, please.” I replied.

“And you?”

“She isn’t staying,” I said cutting off Big Sista. Trish shrugged her shoulders and disappeared into the crowd. Big sista told me what she wanted and I gave her instructions on how to get it. Then I told her I needed her i.d. She looked reluctant then pulled it out without making me ask twice. I liked her swagger, and returned it in kind by not looking at it. I nodded my head and big sista got up and left. For someone who never left the house I had a face that was to easy to recognize.

Trish came back and put my drink on the table. That was why I could chill with her. She just went with the flow. Never too many questions, and when something went down she wasn’t scared to swing. My nigga.

I grabbed my drink and took it down quick. Then I offered to go and get refills. Trish looked surprised, but didn’t say anything just nodded her head. I got up and tried to make my way to the bar. Then I spotted Travis. He saw me and pushed the skank shaking her ass in front of him out the way. She looked disgusted when she turned to see who had caught his attention. She looked at me, and her face dropped. I shook my head and she lowered her eyes and made a hasty get away.

“What is up?” Travis slurred through the gold teeth encasing his mouth.

“Two rum and cokes to my table please.”

“Anything else?’

“Yeah, stop calling my house after 11:00. I like you, but I really hate repeating myself. We clear.”

“Yes ma’am.” He said as he turned and walked away. His whispered bitch under his breath, but as long as he kept it under his breath, I’d let him keep his breath. I turned to walk back to the table when I noticed Trish’s sister had arrived with her 2 stooges. The booth was now full and I was not about to squeeze in, so I stood at the table until one of them had the sense to get up.

Lisa, Trish’s sister grabbed crony number ones hand and they went off dancing. Crony number two was at the table trying to cover her black eye. I said nothing as I sat down. I had met both cronies before, but they were never important enough to remember their names. Go home Sky, go home.

Travis came to the table carrying 4 little tumblers. He placed them all in front of me and began to bat his eyes.

“Come and check on me a couple times and I’ll call you when I’m leaving.”

“You the best” then he walked right back to the skank he was with earlier and she just smiled and started to shake her ass on him again. I shook my head with the same disgust she had shown me only moments earlier. I hadn’t had sex in 2 years and now I remembered why. I slid two tumblers to Trish and drank one of mine like it was a shot. My insides began to warm and my shoulders to relax. I picked up the second tumbler and took a small sip. Trish and Crony number two had been talking since I had come back to the table, but I couldn’t focus on their conversation because I just didn’t care.

“What would you do, Sky?”

“Huh”

“How would you get a man to stop hitting you?”

I laughed out loud. I mean real loud. It even caught Travis’ attention which allowed me to motion to him for another drink. I tried to control my laughter and it was made a lot easier when I saw the look on Trish’s face. I stopped my banter as I tried to figure out what I was reading on Trish. She looked serious and stern; I had never seen that look before.

“Come on, you’re great at giving advice. What would you do?”

“Do about what?” Lisa asked as she scooted in beside me. I turned and stared her dead in her face; she scooted out and told Trish to move.

“I don’t want your opinion I was asking Sky. What would you do?” I didn’t like the way Trish was pushing this on me. So I figured I’d break some of the promises I had made to her before we left my apartment.

“Okay first of all, one of the first things I tell a man when we meet is ‘If you ever hit me I’ll kill you’ and I mean it. Second, you have to be tired and then you have to be tired of being tired. And until you get there, there’s nothing else that can be done.”

“What would you do when you’re tired of being tired?” That was it. Trish was tired of being tired. The thing was I never knew she had a reason to be tired. I thought she and her boyfriend had a really great relationship. Her eyes pleading for a response made me mad. She’s a dummy. How could I have been so wrong? Well here comes a reality check.

I turned and looked at crony number 2. “Are you tired of being tired?” She shook her head yes. I grabbed crony number 2 and punched her in her unbruised eye. She jumped up, fist balled into knots. “I bet when he hits you, you fall into a fetal position. I can bring more harm to you than he ever could. So if you can fight me back, why can’t you fight him?” Lisa was now behind the booth warning crony number 2 that she didn’t want it with me. “Sit down. She’s a grown ass woman she doesn’t need you to tell her what to do.” I guess the beat down I had put on Lisa when we first meet still rang fresh in her mind.

“You’re my size. He’s too big.” She still had her fist in knots, but I knew she had no intention of swinging on me. She wanted me to tell her how to fix her pathetic life; she wanted me to be her savoir.

“Unclench your fist and have a seat. What is your name?”

“Samantha, but them call me Sam.”

“Well hypothetically, I would make my man a good dinner. Make sure I fixed all his favorites. I’d do nothing that made him mad, just be a good little girl.” I felt myself slipping back to all the scenarios I had played out in my head. “Then I’d run him a shower and tell him to get ready for a terrific night. While he was in the shower I would slip into something real sexy and wait for him to come out. I’d strap him to the bed and well then you could just imagine the possibilities.” I was staring blankly at my empty rum and coke. I picked up the class and tasted the watered down soda in my cup. I snapped my head around trying to locate Travis, but instead HE was there, staring at me.

I turned back towards the girls who were now laughing at my plan, all but Trish who looked like she had more questions she wanted to ask. I saw the pain she was in, but it was nothing compared to what I was feeling. Had something gone wrong? Was Flake ok? No. Can’t deal with this right now.

“Trish, honey, I gotta go.”

“Okay, but I’ve gotta talk to you soon. Don’t forget.”

“Never would. Gotta go.

I rushed out of the club, and straight into a cab. His being here couldn’t be a good thing. Had the time come already? Was it finally time for me to go home.