Browsing: Creativity

Daddy’s Coming Home

February 6th, 2009 | By

There is no answer to Why

It’s only a question posed

By those

Who choose

To do the wrong thing for the wrong reason

Self-pity should be treated as a season

Allowed to past

With hope Spring will bring answers

to questions unasked

Behind every dark cloud there’s a silver lining, right?

Even though now I have to fight

My own self doubts

My own situation

This undeniable plight

Where I know I’m not wrong

But who’s to say I’m right

I do

Because he had no right

To take so much

11 at the first touch

I could question Why?

The man that gave you life

That fixed a boo-boo once or twice

Who said you’re sugar and spice

And everything nice

I could scream to the sky, WHY

But I won’t

Because my spring will come

I know I’m not the only one

that life has handed buckets of sorrow

But here I am with friends

And strength to borrow

I’m 16 now

And I get to shape my tomorrow

But I need some help

This is no easy task

I have to ask, someone to help me

Get past my past

Why?

Daddy’s coming home

Graduation Day!

January 23rd, 2009 | By

Studies complete

Graduation underway

See, We graduated from

slave chains to ghetto names

ghetto names to welfare claims

welfare claims to loaded guns

with shaky hands trying to aim

To gain, What?

We graduate from

Checkers to chess

chest to vest

Vest two shades lighter than jacket

color coordinated with caskets

Cause we’re fly to death

But what’s left?

We have no problem graduating from

20 sacks to pounds

pounds to sounds

stories shaping what we sought out

and found

Hip Hop to music dumbed down

A silent ceremony?

We’ve went through

No shoes to borrowed soles

burdened souls to name brand clothes

credit cards to payday loans

no job but never lacking minutes on phone

You’ve got a text! Sender unknown

We’ve covered

no rights to the 15th

15th to silence

silence to civil diobedience

to riots and violence

In neighborhoods we call home

So now I have a question

Are we progressing or degressing?

In this lesson

I implore

Graduate to something more

Say,

whips and chains to lessons of the past

History of our ancestors to morals that last

hate and injustice to those with no sin be the first to cast

stones at the glass house

Or How about

Mother’s struggles to daughter’s ambition

Father’s absence to son’s mission

Victim to survivor transition

For you are not alone

Maybe

poor to credit worthy

credit worthy not because of government survey

but because your credit score is 700 or more

Let’s try

Fly to debt free

debt free to less stress

less stress to better health

Insurance cost is less

Or just for fun

my vote doesn’t count to massive political clout

political clout to massive turn out

Massive turn out to Black Man in the White House

Anything is possible.

It’s Graduation Day.

I’m An East Coast, Down South Kinda Girl

January 6th, 2009 | By

You might find this funny but I love to watch the little music shows on public T.V. There is always some silly song or hilarious act straight out the 70’s that make you realize we aren’t that times may change but rarely do the ideas and principles of the people. I often find myself relating to those that seem to have very little in common with me at first glance.

I heard this song this weekend and it got me thinking. (Mostly because my beau dropped my daughter’s bed on my foot and I’ve been immobilized for the last few days.) But there are some things I Love about the east coast and some things I don’t. There are some things I Love about the South and some things I don’t. So I hope you enjoy.

I’m An East Coast, Down South Kinda Girl

My Youth was the South

Southern drawl dripping from my mouth

And I liked it.

The down home cooking made my day

Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday was the time to pray

And I liked it.

When I was five I didn’t have any shoes

Not one single pair

If we were going some where me and my cousin would take turns and share

I won’t say I liked it but I didn’t really care.

We didn’t worry about locking doors

Mother’s weren’t ashamed of mopping floors

As long as food and clothes could be brought from the stores

And I liked it

The East Coast was my teenage years

My niggas taught me to live with no fear

And I liked it

New meaning came to words I’ve known forever

I was chased by dudes who’s tongues were clever

And I liked it

Style became important and I tried to follow the lessons

Even when it came to crushing some of my blessings

I won’t say I liked it but it countered teenage depression

The music, that’s what I remember the most

Artist didn’t spend their time trying to brag and boast

The idea was to enlighten and uplift the folks

And I liked it.

Time moves forward and so does the world

Even for this East Coast, Down South Kinda Girl

So now looking back, I’d change Liked to Loved

In each and every sentence above

I Love Virginia Baked Ham and Candied Yams

I Love fresh picked Collard Greens and Butter Beans

I Love anythings that’s fried with Mashed Potatoes on the side

The South wins food hands down

I Love men with no gold in their mouth

That’s a negative for most men down south

I Love women with a plan, Not those waiting for a man

Something most Down South Women don’t understand

I Love Big Cities and Bright Lights

The hustle and bustle of the East Coast at night

The East Coast wins swag hands down

When it comes to the moral side of the issue

Every thing gets a little more official

Most of my morals come from the South

Praising the Lord, not afraid to Scream and Shout

But the East Coast has some values to lend

You gotta make money to have money to spend

So where does my soliloquy end

Back at the beginning

I’m An East Coast, Down South Kinda Girl

And I Like—X that—- Love It

————————————————————————-

Gotta add this. Down South girls don’t be mad at me. I know you have dreams and plans but our mothers still insist we need a man. That’s all I’m going to say. I know you understand.`

A Sonskystar Christmas Carol

December 22nd, 2008 | By

It was Christmas Eve in the Ghetto. The snow had just started to fall and Scrooge, the drug dealer, was making his last rounds for the night. He approached his block just as Cracket, his post up boy, had just finished making a sale.

“What’s up, Scrooge. Merry Christmas?”

“Where’s my money?” Scrooge replied.

“The pigs are out. Money is slow.” Cracket stated. “I think I’m going to spend the rest of the night just answering my phone. It’s cold as shit.”

Scrooge got very upset and demanded Cracket stay on the corner until all his work was gone. Cracket agreed.

Now, Scrooge was very tired. He had been up for two days straight filling orders. He hated Christmas. He hated the lights, trees, and chubby white men running around like Santa Claus. Shit, Santa had never came to his house for Christmas. But he couldn’t be mad at all the business this time of year brings in.

When Scrooge got home, he went right to bed.

At the stroke of midnight, Scrooge awoke to a Shhhhh Shhhhh sound. He popped his head up and grabbed his gun. In front of him stood a little kid with a spray can. He was drawing graffiti on Scrooge’s bedroom wall.

Scrooge stated with the threats but the kid kept on drawing. Scrooge attempted to throw the kid out but his hand went right through him. Then with a crack of thunder and a flash of lightening, the little kid stopped drawing and moved, exposing the drawing on the wall.

It was a portrait of Scrooge’s apartment when he was young. The place did not bring back happy memories. The kid finally spoke.

“Bitch ass nigga, I’m the ghost of Christmas pass. You act like you forgot where the fuck you came from. Let me remind you.” And with a spray of his can, Scrooge magically appeared on the outside of the small apartments only window.

Scrooge watched as his younger self hid in the closet while his step father beat the crap out of his mother.

“I don’t want to see this shit. I’m out.” Scrooge shouted.

“Nigga, you ain’t goin nowhere. I suggest you shut up and remember.”

There was loud knock at the door. Scrooge’s cracked up step father opened the door. It was was Scrooge’s grandmother. She forced her way into the house. When she saw the condition of her daughter and found little Scrooge hiding in the closet, she called the police.

“I had a really good Christmas that year. We stayed at Grandma’s. I ate so much food and everyone gave me presents. It was probably my best Christmas ever.” Scrooge remembered fondly.

“Then what the fuck happened to you. Now, all you care about is yourself. What the fucks up with that?”

“Shit, that was only a couple nights. My mom’s went right back on that shit. Can we go now, I don’t like this little trip down memory lane.”

The spirit agreed. With a spray of his can, they flashed back to Scrooge’s bedroom.

“Nigga, I’m just one of the ghost that’s going to fuck with you tonight. Get some rest if you can. Ha Ha” The kid disappeared leaving echo’s of his laughter.

Scrooge thought he was having a bad dream. He climbed back in bed and pulled the covers up. He waited for a moment, examining every sound. Then he decided he was being paranoid and went to sleep.

He was instantly awoken by the sound of music. Then a krump dancer came dancing out of his bathroom. It was like a train wreck, he couldn’t help but watch.

The dancer ripped off his shirt and the words “Ghost of Christmas Present” was tattooed across his chest. He jumped in the air and when he came stomping down, Scrooge was in his Grandma’s house.

“What the fuck is she doing here?” Scrooge shouted rather upset.

The dancer finally spoke.

“Where else would she be? Her power got shut off. She called and asked you for some money to pay the bill but you told her you were broke.”

“I don’t give a fuck. Just because she my baby mama doesn’t mean she has the right to bother my family. I’m a man, I take care of my own shit.”

“So, what would you suggest she do? Let your son sleep in an apartment with no heat or lights on Christmas.”

Then there came another loud knock at the door. It was Cracket’s baby mama.

“Have either of you seen Scrooge? Cracket just got popped and I need some money to get him out.”

Both of the women felt bad. They knew Scrooge wouldn’t help him. Grandma decided to pay the bail.

“What the fuck? Does everybody come to my Grandma for help?”

“Yes. After all these years, she still has to clean up her families mess. You would think she would have some time to rest and just enjoy her life. Instead she has had to clean up your mother’s mistakes and now yours. She is one lucky woman.”

The dancer jumped up and when he came down, Scrooge was in the jail cell with Cracket. He watched as Cracket sat with a picture of his girl and daughter his hands.

The dancer jumped up and when he came down, Scrooge was back in his bed. The dancer snapped and popped backed into the bathroom and the music was silenced.

Scrooge couldn’t take anymore. He got dressed and was about to leave when he heard a mic check.

“What’s up everybody in the place to be. Put your motherfucking hands up. Scrooge, you can’t get away from me. Sit your motherfucking ass down. ”

The rappers lyrical skills were atrocious but he was fully blinged out.

“What’s up booyyyyyyyy? I’m guessing you know I’m the emcee with all the flavor, Sir Christmas Future. You think I should change it to Lil Christmas Future. How about Lil CF? I’ll worry about that later. You ready. Time is money and I ain’t making none off a one man show, you dig?”

“What the hell, let’s get this over with.”

“Let’s go.” Lil CF started beat boxing and they appeared in a graveyard. “Damn dog, don’t look like the future is that bright.”

Scrooge’s baby mother was sitting beside a small head stone. She looked as though she had no more tears to cry. She just sat there.

“What the fuck happened to her?”

“You. You happened to her. Cracket was so mad you didn’t bail him out, he went and got work from your competition. He messed up the deal and ran. They blamed you. When they couldn’t find you, they went after your entire family. They killed your grandma, your mom, Cracket’s girl and daughter, and………”

“And…..And who?”

“They killed your son.”

“No. He ran toward his baby mama and looked at the grave. It had his son’s name etched in tiny letters.”

“I’ll kill them. I’ll kill every single one.”

“You don’t learn shit, do you? Maybe if you were really taking care of shit, none of this would ever happen. I can’t talk to you no more. You ain’t no real OG. Real OG’s know that their family comes first. I got something for your ass.

People just think I’m some wanna be rapper. Shit. I lived your Christmas past. I’ve handled your Christmas present. And I’m blinging in your Christmas future. Since you don’t wanna learn, let me help you speed up the process.”

The rapper began his mic check again and the ground opened up under Scrooge’s feet. He felt his body falling and began yelling.

“I’ll do better. I’ll do better.”

When he opened his eyes, he was back in bed.

He grabbed his phone to check all the messages. His baby’s mama was asking when he would have the money to turn the light on. Cracket was asking if he could go home for the night. And Grandma was asking if he would come over for Christmas Dinner.

Scrooge jumped up. He went to one of his cash stashes and removed all the money. This was going to be the first of the best Christmas’ of his son’s life.

Scrooge called Cracket and told him to bring his family to Grandma. Then he set out to buy toys for his son and presents for the rest of his family.

When he got to Grandma’s everyone thought he had lost his mind. He was handing out gifts, smiling, singing, and just having a good time.

He pulled his Grandma aside and handed her a box. She gave it back. He insisted but she had another request.

“I’m not going to be here forever. I need you to get your shit together so you can take care of this family when I’m gone. That’s all I want for Christmas.”

“You don’t even have to ask. My dealing days are over. I want a blinging Christmas Future. But you deserve a blinging Christmas Present for all the not so cheerful Christmas’ Past. So take it.

Grandma opened the gift. A simple golden cross with I Love You etched on the front. This had to be the best Christmas Ever.

A Time For Change: Chapter 7

December 12th, 2008 | By

I titled the entry with a date, as I had done every significant event that happened to me since I left Richmond. When my mind got racing I had to write down my thoughts quick. When I was home Lena would have listened. I wouldn’t have needed to look at a calendar to figure out the date. May 4th. I gasped for air. All thoughts of why I had ventured into Sean’s room disappeared.

It was our anniversary. I wondered if he had thought of me today. Did he go to our spot and spark a blunt? Did he let Toni Braxton float through his radio waves to remember how I felt? I didn’t even remember what day it was.

I pushed the thoughts out of my head fast. I opened the safe and pulled out the best weed I had. I moved the stacks of hundred dollar bills that blocked the little glad lock containers of weed I kept. I grabbed the NYC Diesel. I heard Sean in the back of my mind telling me I over think on the D. I pulled the Heavy Duty Fruity from the corner backing.

“This should lighten the mood a little bit.” I said out loud.

“Did you forget I was out here?”

“Ain’t nobody forgot about you. Answer the door when Lob knocks in a few minutes.” Then I thought of all the shit she had been through tonight. It tickled me a little a bit. I’m surprised that she wasn’t in a rush to leave. I giggled to myself again and softened my attitude just a little. “Just Lob in and nobody else. Please?” I said after a short pause. I listened for her to respond, but instead I heard the locks begin to unclick. Then I heard Lob’s voice clear and less rapid than it had been earlier.

“I’ll be out in just a second.” I shouted as I locked the safe with the key and scrambled the numbers on the combination spinner. I rolled down the Ashanti poster, Sean used to cover the hole in the wall that held the safe. I pinned the bottom down with thumbtacks. I grabbed the dirty gun from under Sean’s pillow. He had found it and brought it home. Other kids bring home stray dogs or cats. My boy brings home guns.

I stuck the gun in the front of my waistband. I stopped and listened to make sure I didn’t hear any voice other than Lob. News travels fast around the hood. He could all ready know Goldie ain’t protecting me any more. I heard him and Trish laughing. I had only seen Lob laugh when he was real drunk. I stuck my head out the door and there they were chatting it up on the couch.

Trish had a real way of talking to people. She could deal with people feeding her bullshit, without getting upset. Then she even managed to get her way. She could pull information out of people, but I didn’t know if she was capable of using that info to hurt people. I had a lot of questions about how Trish would handle The Life.

I opened the door and Trish got up. I asked her to wait in my bedroom for a minute. She did with no objection. Before she disappeared she turned around a flashed Lob a smile. He smirked and nodded back, then she continued down the hallway into my room.

When the door clicked, Lob began to talk. “Goldie was supposed to make four major deliveries today. He’s got a lot of very hungry niggas out looking for him. Nobody seen him, heard from him since those shots popped off earlier. I’m the only one that knows he was here.” I put my hand up and he stopped. I got up and started to pace the floor in the same tracks that Goldie had traced earlier. Lob attempted to start talking again, but I gave him a look that made him adjust himself in the chair. I didn’t know what to think. I paced a couple more steps then motioned for him to finish speaking.

“I don’t know exactly what’s going on out there. I’m making sure that no one can get close to here though. I got your block tight, but the other areas can’t be controlled right now.”

“How much do I owe you?”

“Nothing. Just stay in the crib.”

“You never do anything for free. What’s the catch? Coming back to get me later?”

“Come on now.”

“You don’t do anything for free. Why should I trust you if you won’t accept my money?”

“I’ve been paid already. You couldn’t match what I’m being paid to keep you safe. Just stay in the crib and I’ll be back later.”

“Paid by who?” I asked in a calm voice, then once again in a much louder demanding voice as he continued to walk away without an answer. I rushed in front of the door to block him from exiting. “Paid by who?” I glared into his eyes making sure not to blink, making sure he knew that I was serious.

“Look, you’ll be safe tonight. Just stay inside please.” He said in an almost pleading manner. I moved out the way and let him pass. “Lock the door. I’ll be back in a little bit to check on you.” Then he closed the door. I stood there staring blankly. “Lock the door.” I heard him yell from the outside. I began locking the door when I heard him yell “Thank you.”

I went into Sean’s bedroom and rolled up. I was so deep in thought, I didn’t even remember breaking the weed up, opening the wrap, or even lighting up. I snapped back into reality when the Heavy duty made me choke. I inhaled again before I finished coughing, which only caused me to cough harder.

“You okay?”

“You wanna hit this?”

“Naw. Can I come in?’

“Just give me a sec okay.”

‘What else could happen tonight. What else could possibly go wrong?’ I thought to myself as I noticed my notebook on the bed. Sean, where are you?

A Big House Reality: Chapter 6

December 9th, 2008 | By

Thelma hated being in her house alone. Her divorce would be final in a few days, and all she could do was think about James. She hadn’t spent a lot of time with her kids since they chose to move with their father. Had she really been so horrible, her whole family would leave her. She thought about the way her life had played out over the last couple months. She couldn’t see what she had done wrong.

She picked up the phone to call James, but quickly slammed the receiver down. What could she say this time that would be different from what she said last time. She hung her head, then stood up and shouted out into the room. ‘I was the best thing he ever had. What he gonna do without me?’ Then collapsed back in her chair and broke into tears.

The phone began to ring. She wiped her eyes and cleared her throat.

“Hello.”

“Mrs. Irving, this is Wendy Watchman of FR Productions. How are you today?”

“I’m fine. I was wondering when I was going to hear from you again.”

“Sorry, got caught up in some technical stuff, but everything is fine now. We’ve set up the show for the weekend of June 3rd.”

“And I need my entire family for this correct?”

“Yes ma’am, and confidentiality is also very important.”

“I am looking forward to this, Ms. Watchman.”

“Great. I can’t wait to meet you and your family.”

Thelma couldn’t wait to call James. She was going so fast she had to redial the number several times before getting it right. The conversation was short, as James agreed to the date and told Thelma he looked forward to seeing her before hanging up. How could he do that? He made you feel so bad, by doing nothing but being sweet. She could sure use him for the other things he does well. She was tired of buying new batteries.

A Big House Reality: Chapter 6

December 9th, 2008 | By

Thelma hated being in her house alone. Her divorce would be final in a few days, and all she could do was think about James. She hadn’t spent a lot of time with her kids since they chose to move with their father. Had she really been so horrible, her whole family would leave her. She thought about the way her life had played out over the last couple months. She couldn’t see what she had done wrong.

She picked up the phone to call James, but quickly slammed the receiver down. What could she say this time that would be different from what she said last time. She hung her head, then stood up and shouted out into the room. ‘I was the best thing he ever had. What he gonna do without me?’ Then collapsed back in her chair and broke into tears.

The phone began to ring. She wiped her eyes and cleared her throat.

“Hello.”

“Mrs. Irving, this is Wendy Watchman of FR Productions. How are you today?”

“I’m fine. I was wondering when I was going to hear from you again.”

“Sorry, got caught up in some technical stuff, but everything is fine now. We’ve set up the show for the weekend of June 3rd.”

“And I need my entire family for this correct?”

“Yes ma’am, and confidentiality is also very important.”

“I am looking forward to this, Ms. Watchman.”

“Great. I can’t wait to meet you and your family.”

Thelma couldn’t wait to call James. She was going so fast she had to redial the number several times before getting it right. The conversation was short, as James agreed to the date and told Thelma he looked forward to seeing her before hanging up. How could he do that? He made you feel so bad, by doing nothing but being sweet. She could

A Conversation Between A Man And A Woman

November 20th, 2008 | By

This is something I wrote a while ago. It was a part of another project but I made some changes and it didn’t make the cut. So now I want to share it with you.

Let me give you a little back round first. A man, fresh out of Jail, with an opportunity to make changes in his life. He meets a non sense woman and the sparks fly. This is a conversation between the two, I hope you like.

The Man: I’m not right for you now. I don’t have anything to give you. I don’t know when I’m going to be ready to love you. I’m not a man because I can’t give you the things you need.

The Woman: I don’t need you to save me.
I might be a lady but I’m mighty.
I got the strength to hold you up, but I’m not going to give more of myself than you deserve.
I bear the brunt of my mothers’ weight on my back.
I make money in my sleep and that fly as shit.
I don’t bitch and moan cuz I keep running into black men with no plan to get ahead.
No desire to do something for themselves.

The Man: That’s not me. I was lead by those that took care of me.
I woke to money piles and weed and bitches with asses so fat you wouldn’t believe.
Then I gave my heart to a broad that walked away hard leaving nothing but dust in her tracks.
A seed that looks up at me and doesn’t see anything I’ve done in my past.
All she sees is her dad. She sees her dad.
Not in glimpses between drunken binges and smoked out benz or behind bars. I got a chance.

The Woman: It takes a lot more than a brother with problems to push me away.
I’m down to fight when the cause is right and the payoff is worth the pain.
To look inside and make a wise decision is something we been missin,
Left out of old traditions we still hold.
A man that understands a chance is nothing more than the opportunity to prove everyone wrong.
It might come in a touchdown or in a song, or a cold beer after a shift so long.
The man that stands up and points out the wrong, that lift up the weak and chastises the strong.
That over look the social crooks of the communities to which they belong.
I’ve meet the guys that realized and made it out.
They come back here with fancy degrees and screams and shouts.
There is racism everywhere, they’ll never let you out.
I can’t make it out. You made it out. What’s that about?
You and me let’s sit down and figure it out.
Did some magic man come and hand you a certificate to excel?
Did they add it all up and you were the one that tipped the scale?
Hell? You got some of that fairy dust to sell?
Or did it come at a cost?
Were you eating oodles and noodles and drinking the sauce?
Did you have to party less and study more, take a job scrubbing kitchen floors.
On campus no less.
Everybody seeing you, no one wanting to be you, and nothing but will pulling you.
See the ones who want to see the light, will question why day never comes after night.
Problems. Problems won’t push me away.
A brother that decides to stay in a mentality with no gray just black and white.
Never questioning why day never follows night.
That just ain’t right. You worth the fight?

———————————————————————————

I’m on the move and my writings are going with me. This should be fun.

A Big House Reality: Chapter 5

November 14th, 2008 | By

Rose wasn’t allowed to answer the phone, unless Daniel or one of the boys were around. Cain rushed in looking like he was expecting a call. Rose motioned for him to slow down and picked up the receiver.

“Marshall Residents.”

“May I speak to Daniel Marshall?”

“He’s at work right now. Maybe you should call him on his cell.”

“I don’t have that number. Would you leave him a message for me?”

“I don’t concern myself with his personal affairs, so I think you should call him on his cell. I can give you the number.”

“No, that’s okay. I found a fax number for him. I’ll reach him that way. Thanks.”

“I know that wasn’t her.” Cain said disappointed.

“Cain, if she wanted to talk to you, she would have called by now.”

“I know mom. I just had a feeling she would call today.”

“Where’s your brother? You know your father likes to see him when he gets home.”

“Don’t worry when dad gets here, Marcus will come out. Until then let’s not rush it. Wanna play a game of chess?”

She nodded her head as she moved toward the chess board.

“Mom, do you miss her, even a little bit?”

“Let’s not talk about that. It’s your move.”

Cain appeased his mother and moved a pawn on the board. This was a game his mother played well. If only she was that good at chess.

A Time For Change: Chapter 6

November 14th, 2008 | By

I didn’t know what to say, so I sat there and said nothing. Sky looked blank and distant. She didn’t move, just stood there with her back to the still open door. I didn’t move, just stayed leaning against the wall of her hallway.

“Do you know how to roll up?” She asked as she finally broke the silence. I shook my head yes. “You any good?”

“I never rolled a wrap before, but I’m sure it isn’t that different.”

Sky said never mind, as she passed me in the hallway in route to her room. I wanted to follow her, but she shut the door before I even turned around. I walked to the door just as a little hood rat poked his head in. I held my hand to his chest as he tried to force his way through the door.

“Sky, you all right” He yelled at the top of his voice.

“She’s fine. Just went to get her head straight. Can I help you with something?”

“Naw. Tell her to hit up Lob when she gets the chance.” He started walking away before he even finished his sentence. I’m beginning to understand where Sky gets cutting people off before they finish speaking. I closed the door and latched every lock lining the door frame. When I finished, I heard Sky’s bedroom door open. She stuck her head out and looked around.

“Was that Lob?”

“Yeah”
“Good” she said as she went into the room Sean came out earlier. She closed the door behind her.